


Alpha's Devotion

by Blue_Night, Janie94



Series: When Passion Colors Everything [8]
Category: Football RPF
Genre: Alpha!Jakub, Alpha!Robert, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mating Bond, Vomiting, alpha!thomas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-06
Updated: 2018-02-06
Packaged: 2019-03-14 08:55:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13586658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blue_Night/pseuds/Blue_Night, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Janie94/pseuds/Janie94
Summary: Robert is struggling to adapt to his self-imposed submissive role in his relationship with Thomas. Both Alphas realize that something needs to change between them, but can they really devote themselves to each other when Robert's heart still yearns for another?





	Alpha's Devotion

**Author's Note:**

> Our dear readers
> 
> We are back with this series.  
> This is a re-posting of Janie94's original version with some additions made by Blue_Night to better show Robert's inner conflict regarding the two Alphas he is in love with. We have worked on this for quite a while, but real life has been throwing obstacles in our way again and again, so we're more than happy to finally post this new part of our three stubborn Alphas. :-)

 

 

**Alpha’s Devotion**

 

 

He had thought it would become easier with time. To submit to Thomas and fulfill the Omega role of their relationship. But instead it only becomes harder and harder.

Robert has been trying his best to make it work because he truly loves Thomas and wants to make him happy, but in the two months following their first time together, it has become increasingly harder to squish down his own need to dominate his partner.

Jakub has been right.

Robert won’t be able to spend the rest of his life submitting to his lover every single time. He is too much of an Alpha to do that. But why did he have to fall in love with two Alphas then? How was this ever supposed to work? 

Robert has tried to make it work by being himself with Jakub, convinced that their love could overcome any obstacle. Only for the older man to leave him behind with a broken heart.

With Thomas, he is now trying to be the submissive lover his dominant Alpha so clearly needs. And he is about to fail as well.

Why doesn’t he get to be happy for once? 

He lets out a frustrated growl as he stares at his reflection in the mirror, noting the dark circles under his eyes and his sickly greyish skin. He looks horrible. 

Deep down Robert knows the reason for it; that he has been twisting his dominant nature for far too long, but he could care less. He wants to be with Thomas, he loves and needs him. His body will just have to adjust to the changes and Robert won’t give up until that day comes.

But he has seen the worry in Thomas’s eyes. It is breaking the younger man’s heart to see him suffering like this even though Robert keeps telling him that it is alright, he merely needs some more time for his body to come to terms with this change. 

Thomas never truly believes him, but he eventually falls silent every time the topic comes up, knowing that Robert won’t let himself be convinced otherwise.

Not this morning though.

Robert has already felt a bit sick when he woke up, but he didn’t think too much of it until he felt a strong wave of nausea hitting him during breakfast. He just about managed to get to the toilet before he started to vomit, a panicked Thomas kneeling beside him and stroking his back. Thomas stayed until Robert was done emptying his stomach, but then he left without another glance back at Robert, clearly upset with him. 

That was half an hour ago.

Slowly Robert turns away from the sink, having finished brushing his teeth and he starts wondering what to do. What he _can_ do.

His body is showing alarming signs, however Robert’s thoughts are more occupied with Thomas and wondering what made the younger man leave. Couldn’t he stand to see Robert so weak? To see proof that their relationship isn’t going to work like this?

Questions like these are still haunting Robert when he finally reaches the training ground a while later, especially after having seen the way Thomas continues to look at him for the whole training unit, his face torn between anger and misery.

Robert has no idea what to say or do to help his lover, a part of him fearing that Thomas feels disappointed with him for struggling to fulfill his Omega role.

When it is finally late afternoon and they have returned to Thomas’s house, Thomas still hasn’t spoken a single word to him; something that scares Robert.

“Please say something, Thomas,” he begs the younger man.

Thomas bites his lip, choosing his words carefully. “Maybe we should sleep in separate beds again.”

Robert freezes, the suggestion shocking him to the core. “Why?”

“Because obviously I’m not good for you,” Thomas replies and he sounds wrecked as though he can barely keep himself together. “Do you think I haven’t noticed the way you’re behaving around me? You always slip into the submissive role when you’re around me even though you’re an Alpha as well. I didn’t say anything because I thought that was what you needed, but now I see that I was wrong. I should have known that you need to dominate your partner every now and then as well and I’m sorry for not letting you go sooner.”

Robert is staring at Thomas for a long time, his heart beating fast with fear. “You’re sending me away?”

“I know you still need someone to comfort you, so you are welcome to stay in this house, but I think we shouldn’t get intimate again. You need to be with someone whom you can be yourself with.”

Robert closes his eyes at the pain welling up inside of him, the words very familiar. Jakub told him the same before they parted ways the first time around.

A shiver runs down his spine and he forces himself to speak despite the lump in his throat. “Please don’t do that. Don’t break up with me and say you’re doing it for my own good.” He takes a step closer, cupping Thomas’s face between his palms. “I love you, Thomas. I can’t take you leaving me as well. Tell me what I have to do to make you stay.”

“I don’t want to let you go,” Thomas insists and his eyes are filled with tears. “But you are an Alpha and for some reason you can’t behave like one around me. I have never wanted you to be my Omega, but that’s what you have been for the past two months.”

Everything he said is true and Robert knows that too. But he has only behaved like an Omega because he thought Thomas would need him to be. Because Jakub would have needed him to be…

But Thomas wants him to behave like a proper Alpha. Does that mean…?

“Thomas, would you submit to me?” Robert asks and it takes him a lot of effort to ask the same thing that has already destroyed his relationship with Jakub. But that’s the only logical conclusion left to draw from Thomas’s actions. “If I asked you to get on your knees for me and let me claim you, would you do it?”

A shiver runs down Thomas’s spine and he only looks at Robert for a long moment. Then he turns away and for a horrible second Robert thinks he is going to leave. But Thomas merely turns his back to him before he starts to undress.

“What are you doing?” Robert asks him even though his earlier question makes it perfectly clear what the other Alpha is doing.

Thomas doesn’t respond. He throws his shirt to the foot of the bed before continuing with his pair of jeans. Robert watches him silently, barely able to believe that this is really happening.

He doesn’t know how to feel, torn between joy and gratitude on one side because Thomas meant what he said and sadness on the other side because Thomas deserves a better ‘first time’.

When Thomas is completely naked and climbs onto the mattress until he is comfortably on all fours, waiting for Robert to take him, the latter makes a decision though.

Slowly he joins the younger man on the bed and places his hands on Thomas’s hipbones. He may not be able to see his lover’s face, but he can still sense the fear and hesitation that Thomas doesn’t want him to notice in the slight trembling of the latter’s body and the slight change of his scent.

Robert knows how Thomas is feeling right now, how scary the thought of submitting to another Alpha is.

To give up all control and give someone else the power to hurt them never comes easy to Alphas and Robert was only glad that his very first time submitting wasn’t planned at all, that the sexual tension between him and Jakub had skyrocketed so fast that he never got to think and worry about submitting until Jakub was sheathed inside his body.

He didn’t have time to feel fear or have second thoughts and when Jakub slammed into him, Robert felt whole. It was overwhelming and yes, it was scary being so vulnerable. But at the same time he had felt like the most powerful being in the world when he felt the other Alpha chasing his climax and marking him as his worthy mate. At least that’s what Robert thought, especially the last time when Jakub knotted him. Robert had never been happier than in this precise moment, feeling his lover coming inside of him and claiming him as his. Even now five months later Robert feels his claim, as though Jakub has left a brand on his soul.

Maybe, this is why his body is having so much troubles with submitting to Thomas now. Jakub has left his claim not only upon his body, but, also upon Robert's soul, the first Alpha who has carved his mark irrevocable into every fiber of Robert's entire being, and every time Thomas claims him, Robert's soul and heart are screaming for his first love. Robert loves Thomas deeply, he truly does, but there is this deep void inside him, the void that can never be filled by anybody else than his first love, his first Alpha – his first mate Jakub.

They might never have completed their bond, but Jakub will always be his mate in his heart, and his body revolts not only against having to submit the entire time, but also against doing that for the Alpha who came after Jakub.

He shoves the thought away and focuses on the naked Alpha in front of him. There is so much he has to thank Thomas for, for picking up the pieces of his broken heart and putting him together again. For loving him unquestioningly and being his friend without ever asking anything from him.  
  
“No, Thomas,” he whispers softly. “Your first time won’t happen like this. I will not take your virginity just because we feel like we have to.” He pulls at Thomas’s hips until the younger man gets the hint and turns around. Robert smiles reassuringly while maneuvering Thomas until he is sitting in his lap, the Pole’s hands stroking gently over his lover’s sides. Then he kisses Thomas softly, trying to reassure him with touches. The younger man doesn’t respond at first, clearly struggling to make sense of Robert’s refusal to claim him. “We don’t have a choice, you need me to finally to submit to you.”

“There is always a choice,” Robert argues and he has no idea why he feels so sure all of a sudden. “You’re right, I will have to dominate you soon. But we will choose the when, where and how together.”

Thomas pulls back with a frown. “But your body-“

Robert puts his finger to Thomas’s lips to silence him. “No. I won’t argue about this point. After what you did for me, you deserve better. For months you have loved me while I was unable to give you my devotion. But things have changed now. I can still barely believe that you are able to accept my love for Kuba, but here you are showing me all your love and feelings without holding anything back.”

“Your love for Kuba is a part of who you are now,” Thomas responds and there is no accusation in his tone. “As I said I may not like it, but I couldn’t possibly ask you to stop loving him. It would make things easier I guess, but then I would be denying you – hurting you - in the worst way imaginable.”

Robert smiles and he tightens his arms around Thomas’s waist. “Thank you. For taking me the way I am, including all my flaws.”

Thomas kisses him again, slower this time and his tongue licks along Robert’s bottom lip teasingly before he replies, “I don’t see any flaws in you, at least not the way you think. Just a man with a broken heart. And I’m glad that you’re allowing me to be the one to mend it.”

“How could I not?” Robert retorts without hesitation. “I’ve tried not to love you, Thomas, but somehow that’s not possible. You filled the void in my heart that Kuba left and filled it with your love for me. And now I can’t stop loving you.”

It's only part of the truth, the void Kuba has left can never truly be filled, and both men know that, but Robert is grateful that Thomas accepts his words like that without reminding him of the other part of the truth – that such a void can never be filled completely by anyone else.

His words make Thomas shiver and a smile happier than anything Robert has seen in a very long time spreads on his face. “Then don’t.”

The words are whispered like a command, but it is one that Robert badly wants to comply with. It is true what he told Thomas; the younger man’s devotion despite all odds pointing against him is the reason Robert has come to love him.

But this is the first time that he realizes he doesn’t have to change for Thomas’s sake like he was convinced for all these months. That the only way their relationship has a chance is when they are both themselves.

Robert leans forward to seal Thomas’s mouth with his own again, carefully parting his lover’s lips with his tongue. The kiss starts out gentle but they both become bolder soon, their moans filling the air while they are clawing at each other. Thomas is already deliciously naked, but Robert is still too dressed and he lets out a low growl when the other Alpha rips at his shirt impatiently.

As soon as Robert has got rid of the last item of clothing, he lets Thomas reverse their positions. As soon as the younger Alpha is straddling him, he freezes. “Wait Lewy. I don’t want you to fall back into that role you have taken up to now.”

“Don’t worry,” Robert tells him. “I’ll show you my Alpha side. I just think you need this position in case you want to stop me.”

Thomas frowns in confusion. “Why would I want to stop you?”

This time it is Robert who shivers in anticipation and he feels a hot wave of want and love course through him before he dares to ask what has been on his mind for a rather long time. “Thomas, will you allow me to become your mate?”

The younger man above him looks at him with eyes wide in shock, unable to speak. Robert’s hands keep carding through Thomas’s hair while he is patiently waiting for the younger Alpha to come to terms with his question.

Eventually Thomas bites his lips, his usually blueish eyes sparkling at the verge of red as he tries to rein in his desire. “You can’t mean that. Not now when you’re still in love with Kuba.”

“You told me several times that you can live with my love for both of you,” Robert tells him and he means every word of it. “Why would you think that I don’t want to become your mate?”

Thomas only shakes his head, apparently unable to come up with a response. “You don’t even know if I’m able to submit to you. What if I can’t do that?”

“I know you will be able to. Because you love me and I believe that your love is strong enough to help you do this for me.”

Thomas leans down again and captures Robert’s lips with his own, a hard and bruising kiss that betrays how close to the surface his Alpha nature is; how vulnerable Robert’s words make him feel.

“Not all hope is lost with Kuba,” Thomas says after he has pulled away, his words strained as though he has trouble speaking them out loud. “You love him and as far as I know he still loves you. If we mate, that door will forever close behind you.”

The thought stings. But Robert knows now that while he was yearning for a dream with Jakub as his mate, he has failed to see what has been unfolding in front of him. That his heart has changed.

He will never stop mourning the loss of his first love, never stop loving Jakub and aching for him in every waking hour of his life, calling for him in his dreams, but becoming Thomas' mate feels right nevertheless, and nothing less than completing their bond will ever be enough for him, Robert knows that now.

“Walking through that door would mean letting go of you,” Robert explains and his own words surprise him. “And I have passed the point where I could live a happy life without you, Thomas. You have made me fall in love with you and now there is no turning back any longer.” He leans up and gently licks along Thomas’s pulse point. “I want you to be a part of my life, Thomas. All you got to do is saying yes and I will make you mine for the whole world to see.”

There is another flicker of red in Thomas’s eyes before they close and he lowers his head down to Robert’s throat. His tongue tenderly drags along the vulnerable skin one time before all of a sudden he bites down hard.

Robert’s back arches up from the mattress as pain and pleasure shoots through his body like lightning. His gasp turns into a loud moan when Thomas only tightens his grip and latches harder to Robert’s throat. The Pole feels like he has been set on fire and his hands come up to tussle in the younger man’s hair.

Thomas is shaking from trying and failing to restrain himself while he is swallowing down Robert’s blood, forging a bond between them that can never be broken again. Robert’s vision has turned white and he can’t see or feel anything beyond the incredible sensation of his Alpha marking him; of the first threads of a tentative mating bond forming between them.

He loses sense of time after that, only aware of his mate’s strength slowly fading away and being replaced by the bliss of their mating. He keeps holding Thomas in his arms until the younger Alpha’s body goes limp and he almost collapses into Robert’s embrace, completely drained even though it is Robert who has lost blood. They don’t move for a while - maybe ten minutes, maybe even half an hour – both of them still lost in the mind-blowing experience.

Eventually Thomas recovers enough to turn his head to the side and smile at Robert. “That was my yes.”

Robert has almost forgotten what he even said, but when he remembers, he returns the smile and moves until Thomas is lying underneath him. The younger Alpha lets it happen without protest, clearly still out of it while Robert has returned his attention to the side of his throat, taking his time to lick over his chosen spot and nibble at the skin playfully.

“Thank you, Thomas,” he says as soon as the throbbing in his teeth – the itch to bite down and mark Thomas as his – has become too much to bear. “Thank you for choosing me as your mate despite everything.”

“Despite what?” Thomas replies. “Kuba?”

“He will always be there inside my heart,” Robert tells him and he doesn’t know why he feels the need to make it sound like a warning. Probably because it is indeed a warning. He and Kuba have never formed a real mating bond, but Robert can feel it in his heart nonetheless, and he knows that it will never break no matter what his future with Thomas by his side will bring.

“And still you chose me to be there, alongside him,” Thomas says and he sounds so unbelievably patient that Robert just wants to hold him tight and never let go.

“You love Kuba and still found the strength to accept my love and become my mate. If that is not a proof of your love for me, then I don’t know what is.”

Robert only stares down at for another long moment before he has found the right words. “How do you do that? Take every one of my weaknesses and turn it into a strength?”

“Because your ability to love with all your heart is a strength,” Thomas responds confidently. “And anyone who thinks otherwise is a fool. Including you.”

Robert has to chuckle at that. Only Thomas could compliment and insult him in the same sentence. But he isn’t going to argue this point, not now when his own throat is still throbbing with the pain of Thomas’s bite.

“You deserve all the love that’s in my heart,” he vows right before he places his mouth over Thomas’s skin and breaks the skin with his teeth.

The younger man lets out something between a moan and a whimper, his hands clutching the Alpha above him tightly and holding on for dear life while Robert is sucking hard, his mouth filling with the strong taste of Thomas’s blood.

Once again his senses are overloaded by the onslaught of sensations, of feeling too much and too little at the same time and he swallows greedily, feeling the threads of their mating bond strengthening. The last thing he is able to feel before he blacks out is Thomas's whispered “I love you, Lewy”.

Many, many miles away a blond Alpha tightly clutches his kitchen counter while an unbearable pain is burning through his body and he feels like he is being torn in two. His head has hit the ground before he has even started screaming...

**Author's Note:**

> If you liked this part, we would love to get feedback from you, be it comments or kudos.


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